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Old 09-29-2008
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Default Passing on/Death...

I have an elderly home bound grandmother that my tia's and mom take turns to help take care of...about 2 years ago my mom asked me to fill in her days while she went out of town for 2 weeks, which were Tuesdays and Saturdays...after 2 weeks my mom came back and I decided that I wanted to have my own day to stay with my abuelita...I love spending time with her...she tells me stories of her life, her struggles and accomplishments...I admire her so much...

Here recently she's been saying things like, "I'm so tired" and "Dios me ha dado muchos anos" and she doesn't eat as well as she used to...she sleeps alot and doesn't want to come out of her room, she seems depressed somehow....I'm worried....Past experiences have shown me that when people start to speak this way it only means one thing....death....Has anyone experinced this before with loved ones? Do you think people, who are like in my grandma's situation, really know when they're "time has come?"
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Old 09-29-2008
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Default Re: Passing on/Death...

Some people are very knowledgable when they are in that state of when they are going to pass. Nothing wrong with it and (yes i say this and i believe it, but you dont have to like it) should do as she wishes if not make her passing better/ more comfortable. She has a been on a long trip from her birth til now, she still does have a long way to go when she does move on.

Spending time with you and passing on her stories to you may have even helped her come at peace with things.

As for if i have ever been in that situation. Well my grandma, which was really my great grandma, her last days were in a nursing home. She went a long way/ time in there. By the time her time came, i dont know if she was aware of what was going on. WShe couldnt speak, but i do know when my mom would visit, she would perk up a little bit and sometimes even shed tear. She knew my mom was there. Even if other said that never happened with them and didnt think she was totally aware. But my mom and her had a bond.

I have heard of some people knowing when there time is coming though. I only hope when it is my time or nearing my time i know.
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Old 09-29-2008
mrart mrart is offline
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Default Re: Passing on/Death...

I think that some people may have a feeling and other times they do not want to burden people with needing to be cared for. Either way enjoy your time for with her and cherish the memories. I give you much respect to care for her and want your own day, i know it was not easy caring for my father when he needed contsant care, and most people shy away, Much respect homegirl
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Old 09-29-2008
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Default Re: Passing on/Death...

I'm not a selfish person, I know that she has to pass on one day....We try to make her as comfortable as we can....

as far as shying away....I have to admit that when my mom asked me to stay with her I wasn't too enthusiastic about it...maybe because I didn't know what to do or maybe because I didn't want to be responsible for making sure she took her medication...but I'm glad I did....

I had a friend who's great grandmother would say the same things as my grandmother would say...she even went as far as getting very personal items together and giving them away to her loved ones....2 weeks later she passed.
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Old 09-29-2008
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Default Re: Passing on/Death...

I think some people are well aware that they're going to die, but I don't think that any of the people that I knew... knew that they'd die soon. Right now, my grandfather is sick, and we honestly thought he'd die a couple of months ago. He wasn't waking up or eating. We all rushed to Mexico to be with him, and he's still with us.

I personally rather not know when I'm going to die. I don't fear death, I just love life too damn much. lol
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Old 10-01-2008
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Default Re: Passing on/Death...

I was with my abuelita yesterday, and she seemed to be in better spirits than here recently....she even ate alot...I made her some shrimp tostadas...I love it when she's happy!!!!
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Old 10-03-2008
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Default Re: Passing on/Death...

I don't know I have had many family members cash it their ticket & some of the elderly ones many times went thru that depresed phased that gave the appearance that they were starting to circle the drain...But then they would bounce back...

Turns out because they don't complain much they wouldn't come out and just say they needed a little more attention...But I figured it out and did just that...spent more time with them...Got a few more years of some rreally good talks doing that...I am glad I did...
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Old 10-03-2008
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Default Re: Passing on/Death...

Quote:
Originally Posted by sweetnspicy79 View Post
that is good to hear tru...HOpefully she will have many more years to enjoy..keep us updated..
awwwe thank you....you are so sweet to care....*hugs* and *rep*
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Old 10-04-2008
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Default Re: Passing on/Death...

Quote:
Originally Posted by just tru View Post
I have an elderly home bound grandmother that my tia's and mom take turns to help take care of...about 2 years ago my mom asked me to fill in her days while she went out of town for 2 weeks, which were Tuesdays and Saturdays...after 2 weeks my mom came back and I decided that I wanted to have my own day to stay with my abuelita...I love spending time with her...she tells me stories of her life, her struggles and accomplishments...I admire her so much...

Here recently she's been saying things like, "I'm so tired" and "Dios me ha dado muchos anos" and she doesn't eat as well as she used to...she sleeps alot and doesn't want to come out of her room, she seems depressed somehow....I'm worried....Past experiences have shown me that when people start to speak this way it only means one thing....death....Has anyone experinced this before with loved ones? Do you think people, who are like in my grandma's situation, really know when they're "time has come?"
I do believe that some people know when there time is near. My great grandmother passed away at 98.... and 5 months before she passed on she began saying, "God has granted me many years, I have seen my children, my grandchildren and my great children grow before me, it has been 20 years since my husband went to god and I feel I am tired, I have nothing left to give and I am ready" (In spanish of course). There was no indication that she was sick, up untill a week before she passed on she still walked to church and was healthy for being 98. She quietly passed away in her sleep.
My grandmother passed recently, I adored, I loved her I had many great memories of her and we spent alot of time together and it was very hard. She had kidney failure and was on dialysis and about 2 weeks before she passed she told my dad " They say they want to take my legs, what will I be worth without my legs?" "I know you need me and do not want me to go but if they take my legs than I have nothing left" "Your father died 15 years ago and he wants me back, I am tired mijo, I am ready to go and be at peace" This is what she told my dad. She had no health risks going in but after they admitted her she went into cardiac arrest and died peacefully the night after.
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Old 10-04-2008
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Default Re: Passing on/Death...

^^^thank you for the input.....I think that's why she's been a little depressed...she was really very independent and a little stubborn and didn't ask for much help from anyone...she was and I believe still is, very healthy....the thing that slowed her down was one day she fell from her bed and broke her hip and had to have surgery....since then she's never really been the same.
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