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  #1  
Old 08-25-2009
Dee's Avatar
Dee Dee is offline
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Location: The Island
Posts: 12,944
Default New HR Policy

Several visitors to our office have brought to our attention that our Spanish-speaking employees commonly use offensive language.

Such behavior, in addition to violating firm practices, is highly
unprofessional, offensive both to visitors and employees, and will
not be tolerated. We have decided to implement a series of rules in our
office and would expect them to be applied. It is expected that ALL
employees
immediately adhere to these rules:

1 - Phrases like 'cabrón', 'ah, chingado', ' como chingas', and
other such
expressions will
not be used for emphasis, no matter how heated the
discussion may get.

2 - Non-important matters should not be addressed as 'pendejadas'.

3 - You will not say 'la cagó' when someone makes a mistake, or 'ya cago el palo' if you see someone being reprimanded. All forms! and derivatives of the word 'cagar' are inappropriate in our environment.

4 - Lack of determination will not be referred to as 'falta de huevos', nor
will a person with lack of initiative be referred to as 'huevon ' or
'mamón'.

5 - No Manager or Supervisor, under any circumstances, will be referred to
as 'hijo de la chingada', 'culero' or 'ese cabrón'.

6 - When a proposal is presented, the phrase 'estas20son babosadas'
must not be used.

7 - Unusual or creative brainstorming meetings will not be referred
to as 'pinche chingaderas'.

8- Do not say ' como jode' if a person is persistent, or 'se
jodió' if somebody is going through a difficult situation. Furthermore, you
must not say 'puta madre', or 'esto ya valió madre' when matters become
complicated in your line of work.

9 - When asking someone to leave you alone, you should not say
'vete a la chingada cabron'.

10- Do not substitute '¿Que Chingados quieres?' for 'May I ! help you?'

11- When leaving the office, using the phrase 'me voy a la chingada' is not proper.

12- When any office equipment fails, it must be reported as 'it
broke down', not as 'esta chingadera valió madre'.

13- Last but not least, after reading this memo, please do not say
'me voy a limpiar el culo con esto'. Please file this memo properly.



GRACIAS,

EL PINCHE HUMAN RESOURCES DEPARTMENT
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"I take out the white part and finger out all the goodness"
"Nessa, Dannie and Dee...we should have a poptart foursome
i'll nibble off the edges, dee can lick the icing while dannie and nessa consome the warm and sticky innards" *drools*
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  #2  
Old 08-26-2009
Dee's Avatar
Dee Dee is offline
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Location: The Island
Posts: 12,944
Default Re: New HR Policy

yay one person thought it was funny lol
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"I take out the white part and finger out all the goodness"
"Nessa, Dannie and Dee...we should have a poptart foursome
i'll nibble off the edges, dee can lick the icing while dannie and nessa consome the warm and sticky innards" *drools*
- SD (Butterfingers)
Soldier is my crazyyy freak
SJ is my favorite mod!
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  #3  
Old 02-18-2015
BTOWNMAMI239's Avatar
BTOWNMAMI239 BTOWNMAMI239 is offline
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Location: 5th Dimension
Posts: 1,657
Default Re: New HR Policy

**BUMP**

Is this for real? If so, I wish I worked in an office with other Spanish speakers, where I could communicate with them like this. HAHA.
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  #4  
Old 02-18-2015
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SoyCatracho SoyCatracho is offline
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Posts: 3,874
Default Re: New HR Policy

Shit is hilarious! Shoulda been a hit! Sorry, Dee!
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  #5  
Old 04-10-2015
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WalktownzMamii WalktownzMamii is offline
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Posts: 43
Default Re: New HR Policy



I would so get written up if this was in place at my job! Especially, because of number 5.
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